So really, I almost never, never complain about Esteban outloud. Really. I feel so blessed to have him in my life. But I am a woman and therefore I am allowed to vent just once.
He is so great with the kids and I have always tried to let him parent the way that works best for him. You know, ignoring that nagging feeling to constantly coach him along or rant and rave until he learns to do things my way. This has not been an easy task as I have been known to be a control freak in this lifetime. We very rarely fight and almost never when it comes to kids. I’d say we make a pretty good team. But he is a man and there are just little details that men are not accustomed to polishing.
Lil Esteban Shows off his socks for the first & last time...
We all know the economy sucks right now. Esteban works in construction and actually, has made it through most of the winter with pretty steady jobs. The last 3 weeks however, work assignments have been swinging back and forth on a pendulum. I know he worries, but we had prepared for this, so financially we are not feeling the crunch. Though we have plans for the savings, I assure him that there is no need to fret. The bonus – we get to spend lots of time together…something I never get tired of doing.
We haven’t been out much because of the rain. When I saw the sun start to poke out from behind the clouds, I knew it was time to get out and at the very least, run the errands. The plan, drop Esteban off with Ms. Daisy…I mean, at Ernesto’s kindergarten class to help out for an hour or so. I’d use the time to walk the babies until school let out. Then, we’d all head to the grocery store. Last, we’d make a stop for art supplies (cuz I just don’t have enough material, even though I have boxes and boxes of stuff) in order to start working on the project Ms. Daisy assigned to the students’ fathers. Easy.
Everything went well…even though the kids and I spent more than 10 minutes of potty time in the grocery store restroom (something fathers just can’t understand). By the time we made it to the dollar store, little Patricio was sick of being strapped into the stroller. Amazingly, Amber wasn’t complaining to get out too. So, Papi (daddy) decided to rescue the little guy and carry him through the store. When I saw him grab the baby, I nearly told him: Don’t let those socks fall off and get lost. Instead, I bit my lip and went on my treasure hunt.
As always, Esteban abandoned me in the store. What is it with men that they just can’t stick with you? They have to wander off on their own…then they complain that you took too long. They never understand that a lot of the time, you are looking around for them to get an opinion, or yet, you are ready but they got the dough.
Mommies are always grateful for extra-wide stalls.
Anyways…we checked out, made it to the car and OH NO!!! Papi realizes he lost one of the baby’s socks. I wanted to wring his neck. I actually ran back into the store and paced the ailes 3 or 4 times, combing each section, desperate to find that little sock.
Now before you roll your eyes and remind me “it’s just a sock”…please allow me to elaborate a bit. This sock was the cutest boy sock ever. A red and white little sock made to look like Converse High-Top sneakers. I had purchased a similar pair weeks earlier to give away at a baby shower (hi Julie…glad the baby is still snuggly warm in that uterus of yours…3 more weeks?). You see, I am a pack rat. I save everything that has the teeniest bit of sentimental value. I’ve gotten much better over the years and actually, have done remarkably well when it comes to saving momentos for the kids. Up to now, Ernesto and Amber both have a small treasure bag each with 3 of their newborn outfits, socks & beanies.
I had been feeling guilty as I haven’t been able to put together something really special for lil Esteban. We weren’t given a baby shower this year while expecting him, so I, forever the practical one, registered for just the basics -bottle supplies, wipes & diapers – my team from PG&E insisted on hooking me up with something (thanks guys!). Mom of course couldn’t be talked out of shopping, so I insisted on her only getting some basic onesies and sleepers…we’d worry about cute stuff later, I said.
So a few weeks before Esteban Patricio was born, I did go out to find a special coming home outfit and socks. Those are safely put away now. But I looked at his little treasure bag compared to older brother and sister and thought, “he’ll think I didn’t love him as much”. That day that I went shopping, I came across those adorable little socks and bought him 2 pairs. Brown and Red. Brown, because they’d match with a lot more outfits. Red, because the color really popped and I knew I’d have to snap some cute pictures of him in those socks.
So now, is it “just a sock?”
Well, yes, of course it is…I know. I guess what really bugged me down, is that had I dared told my dearest Esteban, “be careful with those socks”…”don’t forget to keep checking for his socks”…”don’t let him kick off those socks”…he would have given me “the look” and made me feel like a total nag. But you see, men just don’t understand. There are things mothers just know that fathers don’t ever stop to anticipate. If fathers had our same fore-thought, they could save themselves a lot of grief. Like, why didn’t he just instinctively know that it was a bad idea to ask me what was wrong when I returned to the car empty-handed and broken-hearted. Didn’t he know that while I perused the store, my hopes were brought up, only to be slammed back down?
Daddy intros Baby Girl to Wildlife = Mommy's Heart-Stopping Moment
Just as I made my final round, a voice rang out on the loud speaker: If someone has lost a –at this point my heart literally began to race and I turned to run up to the front of the store –child, please come to the front counter. DOH!
I felt so silly in that moment. I even laughed at myself outloud…really, would they announce on the loud-speaker: Would the frantic mother of the child who kicked off his beautiful red and white knit sock that she had planned to save for 20 years but now can’t since her hubby doesn’t pay attention to the little details, please report to the front counter.”?
I didn’t mean to let him have it, but I did. And now I feel terrible. I’d try to explain, but I know he won’t understand. I love him though. And next time, I’m gonna tell him to take care of the socks. That or just snatch them off when he’s not looking and stuff them into my pocket. I’m also hoping, that one day, he’ll remember not to ask stupid man questions that always get him into trouble because I’ve gotten really good at not opening the door as long as he forgets to ring the doorbell.
